Hi there,

Welcome back to You Got a Minute by LifeAt. If you’re new here, you can get caught up by checking out our blog here!

If you’re interested in sponsoring a spot on our ever-growing newsletter, click here 🌱

There’s a certain kind of silence between friends that used to scare me.
The texts get slower. Plans take longer to coordinate. You both mean to call, but the days start blending together. Suddenly, it’s been months.

In school, friendship meant proximity. You didn’t have to schedule connection; it just happened. Now, it takes planning, and energy you don’t always have.

I used to interpret that distance as fading closeness. But after some time, I’ve started to think of it differently. Maybe it’s not distance at all. Maybe it’s just a slower pace, one that still counts as love, even when it doesn’t feel like it’s constantly present.

🌿 When friendship starts slowing down

Some friendships thrive in constant contact - the daily memes, the voice notes, the random check-ins. Others breathe on a slower schedule. They stretch, quietly, between the moments that really matter. As we move forward in our lives, we grow and adapt to new life events - new jobs, new relationships, moving around town (or across the country.)

Sometimes while we’re out living our lives we forget to check in or make time for our people.And that’s okay! Connection doesn’t lose meaning just because it changes shape.

Often, the most grounded friendships are the ones where you can go quiet for a while and pick up right where you left off. The ones where you don’t have to apologize for being tired, or “falling off.” You just... arrive again. And things are fine. 🙂 

What’s strange is how rare that kind of trust feels in adulthood, the kind that allows stillness. Most of us are juggling work, bills, mental load, and barely managing our own energy, let alone someone else’s schedule. But that doesn’t mean we care any less. It just means the friendship has to find a new language.

💭 The language of slower connection

There are times when love shows up as a late-night text that says, “Saw this and thought of you.” Or a five-minute call between errands. Or a meme that makes you laugh mid-meeting (lol sorry boss.)

Small gestures keep the thread alive. They don’t have to be grand or involve coordinating a cross country trip, they just have to say, “I still see you. and tbh i miss you”

We underestimate how many friendships quietly end because we mistake slowness for neglect. Slow connection isn’t neglect or giving up, it’s adaptation. It’s learning to fit care into a fuller life without burning out from it.

When both people understand that rhythm, the friendship starts to feel safer. More like a resting place, less like another thing that “has to get done.”

🪞 Building unbusy friendships

I’ve been trying to treat friendship less like a shared calendar and more like a shared presence. Not: When can we hang out again? But: How can I remind you I’m here, even when we don’t talk every day?

It’s a quieter form of love… but also a deeper one.

Some stuff to try out:

• Send a message without expecting a reply. Just to say hi, or share a weird moment in your day.

• Check in on birthdays, but also on random Tuesdays. That way you’re not only reaching out because of obligation.

• Leave voice messages instead of typing long texts. Yap as long as you wanna, it feels way more personal.

• Accept the gaps. They’re part of the friendship’s rhythm now, and as long as both of y’all communicate on expectations, things can feel easier.

Unbusy friendship is the kind that respects real life and still finds connection in the spaces that remain between. ❤️ 

✏️ Journal Prompt

Which friendships feel calm to you, the ones that don’t demand constant upkeep, but still feel secure?
Write about what makes them feel safe, and how you might bring that same energy to other relationships.

LifeAt: Focus with joy

LifeAt isn’t just a productivity tool—it’s your personal focus sanctuary. With a Pomodoro timer, over 1,000 aesthetic virtual spaces, cozy soundboards, and a planner that actually keeps you on track, it’s built to make work feel good.

✨ Romanticize your workflow. Try LifeAt today and create a routine you’ll actually look forward to.

Reader Spotlight ❤️

We want to feature our community bi-weekly! Submit your profile here!

Real or AI 🤖

tbh I thought those sea otters would get y’all confused 🦦 it def confused me! But y’all paid close attention to those oddly shaped paws & were right! 70% of you picked Image 1 as the real(ly) cute little sea otters!! 👏 The water’s weird texture also felt off, and the little beady eyes felt… flat. Like the water. AI hasn’t figured out how to make things feel like they’re alive, which is good for us.

This week, I challenge you to look carefully between these two pictures. One is a pair of real girls, enjoying TikTok together… the other is just a hyper realistic replication of the two. So one is real, and one is just an AI duplicate… which is do you think is real? Vote below & tell us what Image is REAL!

🌙 Distance doesn’t always mean goodbye

Not every friendship needs to be loud to be alive.
Sometimes love looks like a quiet thread (stretched, but steady) between two people just doing their best.

You don’t have to text every day to mean it. You just gotta keep meaning it, even when you’re quiet. ❤️ 

smile, it’s a nice day out :)
🌱 rorrie